4x800 Takes 10th at Drake Relays

Carleton Sports - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 8:15pm

The Carleton College men’s track and field team’s entry in the 4x800-meter relay finished 10th at the Drake Relays on Friday morning.  Brothers Thor and Noah Laack-Veeder (Sr./Madison, Wis./LaFollette) comined with Arnaud Kpachavi (Sr./San Gregorio, Calif./Woodside Priory School) and Jerry Cook-Gallardo (Fy./Moscow, Idaho/Moscow) to post a time of 7:46.41, which is also tops in the MIAC this season.

Categories: Colleges

Horoscopes: April 24, 2015

Manitou Messenger - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 8:05pm

Honey I’m home!  Miss me?  I didn’t. Your life probably went to a tackily named bed cover store (aka sheet sheet sheet) when I was gone. We’ll here’s another pile of hot, steamy sheet (it just got out of the dryer). Only these sheets will blow your sheets off. You won’t sleep well with no sheets but you also will sleep well knowing you’re safe and insecure for the next week. Just sit back, tense up and enjoy this week’s edition of Loki’s Horoscopes.


Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20)

Get with the times. Get a pair of those fresh-ta-death headphones Beats By Hey! Hey Arnold, that is. Turn your head into that football shape by crunching it between two movable bookshelves in the library. Now you’re ready to wear those sick looking badboys.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Snicker at a Snickers bar while playing snood with snoopy in sneakers and snear because you’re a snippy, snappy loser who’ll never see another millenium. Stop alliterating and start crying.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Riverboat?  More like Riverbloat. Eat enough food to bloat your quadruple cow stomach. Eat sixteen hundred whale-esque snails. Then, in order to be the Belle of the ball at Riverboat, drain your bloated stomach with a transparent, and for no apparent reason, jagged tube in the middle of the boat. You’re the captain now.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

It’s getting to be that time for the spring slide. I mean the slide that runs from the top of the windmill to the natural land’s pond. But it will only appear if you step off the windmill and believe. So spread your wings and trust, you gullible litle heron.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Make it rain. I’m talking about money or moisture droplets, no, make it rain brain. Brain as in knowledge. Brain as in knowledge that is kept in your brain. Make it rain your brain. Share you knowledge with the world and clone your brain and shred that thing up like a chicken taco and go around making in rain on people’s heads like, “what up world, here’s my clone brain for your sick pleasure.”

Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22)

Time to get famous. Pitch a new series to Netflix. Call it “Loser Kid Listens to Horoscope and gets Laughed at by Netlfix for Pitching a Show Called, ‘Loser Kid Listens to Horoscope and get Laughed at by Netflix for Pitching a Show Called, ‘Loser Kid Listens to Horoscope and get Laughed at by Netflix for Pitching a Show Called, ‘How My FUPA Became Charlie Sheen: The Incredible Story of One Man and His Dog.’’’”  I’ve heard it’s meta as ducks.

Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22)

No summer plans?  Become the campus ghost. Haunting will look good on any resume and if you’re good enough you might even scare the Benjamins out of someone. Happy hunting.

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22)

Drag ball is coming up so it’s time to show the campus who is the fastest and the furriest. Steal a pub safe car and put enough noz in the tank to blow a juggalo back to sanity. Then dress up like a furry and race to your little heart’s content. Don’t forget to attach the biggest metalic peanut you can find to the back of your drag racer, it’s the only way to have fun and inflict massive amounts of property damage. Let Drag Ball begin!

Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21)

Didn’t win SGA elections?  Didn’t even run?  Well move on to bigger and better things. Submit your name as an independant for the Prezy of United States of America. Make a Prezi that highlights all your worst attributes. It’s best to be transparent and honest. Clean out all those skeletons no matter how graphic, then force every American citizen to watch your Prezi. If they refuse, then ask them to wear a hat which has a nanochip in it. When put it on use mind control to make them watch the Prezi. If they refuse to wear the hat then tell them they have no style and ridicule them until they wear it. Or just scrap the whole thing and eat a pause pizza. 

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21)

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I think you all know where this is headed. Scoop out your crush’s eyeball and dissect it to see what’s beautiful about it. Then use their eye as a contact lense and wear it to see what’s beautiful to them. Then conform to their image of sexy like the conformist you are. Clog all your pores with mayo and then clear them out by having a cannibal clown blow on your face. Your face will be so dirty and scared that all the ugly will run away. Now you’re beautiful.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19)

Fun fact: St. Olaf has a literate giant in a tiny top hat in the tunnels beneath the school. Protest for the giant’s rights outside of Buntrock. No one ever will ever believe you ever, but when the giant finally breaks out and starts reciting the boring poetry it wrote about the cement walls and rats in the tunnels, it will spare you. Bonus fact: the giant’s poetry will drive everyone into the tunnels beneath the school. There they will grow into giants and the cycle will repeat.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18)

Loki’s time is running out. Loki loves you all. Loki will propose to you all. Don’t let Loki. You love Loki but don’t want Loki to follow you everywhere. Loki will follow you everywhere. In your heart. Or in your house. Call the police on Loki. Police can’t see Loki. You can’t see Loki. Loki is everywhere. Loki is air. Breath in Loki. Loki is part of you. Forever. Praise Loki.

Categories: Colleges

Flaking on friends gives millennials a bad rap

Manitou Messenger - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 7:42pm

In her March 18 op-ed piece published on, Katie Hakala argued that technology – specifically texting – has allowed young adults to become huge flakes, arriving late to events after sending a quick “be there soon!” text, and deciding last-minute not to show up at all.

She makes a good point. I think I would be hard pressed to find a current Ole who has never relied on a cell phone to flake out a little.

Can we push back dinner to 6:15?

Ugh. I just have so much work. Would it be okay if we do tomorrow instead?

I’m soooooooooo sorry, but I’m really tired and I think I’m just going to go to bed.

We’ve all done it. Some are worse offenders than others, but it happens all the time.I agree with Hakala that the increase in flakiness certainly has a significant negative impact on friendships. (For instance, I have diminished trust in my friends who frequently flake.) I don’t believe, however, that the flaking phenomenon arose from the convenience of texting. I think it’s actually selfishness, bred in the “you do you” world in which we twentysomethings grew up.

Millennials are not the iPhone-wielding mob of entitled narcissists that bloggers for the Huffington Post and the New York Times might have you believe. Most of my friends and peers have cares that reach far beyond the millennial sphere of hedonism in which they all supposedly operate. They want to invent drugs, teach children, fight social injustice and be elected to office. They want to change the world – not just earn money and go on vacation and watch TV.

We are not self-obsessed, but we are a little selfish. We’ve been taught – and wonderfully so – that we can do whatever we want to do and be whoever we want to be, and that we don’t have to answer to anybody but ourselves. That’s a great message, but it leaves out one important truth: we still have responsibility to one another.

Dear fellow millennials, college students, friends and peers: please stop being giant flakes and bad friends. Stop trading a friend’s trust for the instant gratification of staying home with a glass of wine. Stop arriving hours late because you had to watch just one more episode. The truth is that flakiness is not a quirky and inevitable characteristic of the millennial mind, but rather a social problem that needs active solving.

The good news: this is solvable. Here’s how.

Honor your commitments. Unless you are sick or facing an emergency, go to the party you said you would attend and show up at dinner at the time you suggested meeting.

Close Netflix. Your futon is so comfy, and “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” is so good, but that’s too bad. Arrive where you said you would when you said you would. Kimmy will still be there for you tomorrow.

Apologize sincerely when you do have to bail (stomach flus and traffic jams do happen). Don’t offer excuses or make your friend reassure you that it’s totally fine.

Don’t try to justify flaking by being a “maybe” for every commitment thrown your way. If you’re always a maybe and you never show up, you are treating friends just as disrespectfully as those who RSVP with a “yes” and then bail last-minute.

Flaking, even if it’s “classic you,” is not funny or fine. It’s disrespectful, rude, thoughtless and hurtful. Stop it. If you’re “not a planner,” become one for just a few minutes each week so that you can show up when you said you would.

Independence and self-actualization are awesome. We can – and should – seize the opportunity to follow our own dreams and do what we want. But we should not do what we want all the time. That’s a lot of what’s wrong with this country and this world – the belief that people possess the ability to do anything they please without the responsibility to anybody else.

It’s time for millennials to cast off our bad reputations as entitled narcissists by demonstrating responsibility and treating our friends with respect – even when we don’t particularly feel like it.

Ashley Belisle ’15 ( is from Mahtomedi, Minn. She majors in English and Spanish.

Categories: Colleges

Franco Fest inspired amateur filmmaking

Manitou Messenger - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 3:54pm

A small, devoted and exclusively female crowd gathered in Viking Theater on the evening of April 19 for “Franco Fest,” a James Franco inspired film festival. The festival was held on Franco’s birthday. He turned 37, and though he couldn’t join St. Olaf for the film celebration, he was there in spirit.

Put on by the St. Olaf Film Production Society, the idea behind the festival was to gather student produced Franco-esque films. Students could draw ideas from Franco’s past films, writing, art and persona. The festival screened four submissions, each portraying a vastly different interpretation of James Franco. The St. Olaf Film Production Society advertised for the festival with ambiguous posters and videos in which St. Olaf students described what James Franco meant to them.

The festival was kicked off with a brief speech by the coordinators, full of dry humor and describing Franco and his work. The audience was also shown various trailers of Franco’s past movies, including 127 Hours and Spider-Man 2.

The first submission was an interpretation of As I Lay Dying, a film directed by Franco in 2013, based on the novel by William Faulkner of the same title. The movie was filmed on an iPhone and meant to be watched on an iPhone.

The second submission was narrated in French, and was inspired by the various novels Franco has written about his A-list life. The film had an artsy flair to it, and embodied the narcissistic and renaissance qualities that Franco exhibits. Arguably, this film had the highest production value of any of the submitted films. It was artfully edited and beautifully framed.

Next was another brief film that was created as a parody of the critically acclaimed movie 127 Hours, in which Franco played the main character, Aron Ralston. It was a rather tongue in cheek, five second synopsis of the original movie.

The last film prevailed victorious after audience voting. Created by Isabella Vergun, it was titled “The Franco Diaries.” Vergun attempted to live her life living and breathing James Franco for five days, trying to understand what it feels like to be the renowned actor. One of Vergun’s tactics was recording her thoughts as she just woke up, trying to imagine what it’d be like to get into Franco’s gossamer mind.

The festival wrapped up with a video from St. Olaf Film Production Society, paying homage to some of Franco’s best films and quotes. Despite the small turnout, audible laughter following all of the films indicated that the tribute to Franco was a success.


Categories: Colleges

Theater company makes debut with ‘Lady’

Manitou Messenger - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 3:40pm

With no stage, no set and only a handful of props, the three actors of Craig Wright’s Lady had the task of captivating their audience with their performances alone. It was a mission that the fearless first-years of Myswyken Salad Theatre Company pulled off with aplomb.

Seniors may recall hearing Craig Wright’s name tossed around three years ago when the theater department staged his most well-known work, Recent Tragic Events, and Wright himself visited campus. Lady is similar to Recent Tragic Events in that it takes on post-9/11 political discourse alongside fragmented relationships and existential angst. Chaz Mayo ’18, Ian Sutherland ’18 and Will Ibele ’18 played Lady’s three middle-aged, longtime friends, whose personal demons break into violence on a weekend hunting trip.

The Art Barn was the perfect venue to convey the suffocating quality of old friendships that can no longer conceal the rage built up over decades. There were no barriers between the audience and the actors; the first-row viewers were only several feet from them, creating a disconcerting sense of intimacy and urgency that complemented the emotional narrative very well.

Three rows of seating on each side of the atrium faced each other in thrust-stage fashion, and due to the natural lighting coming through the Barn’s many windows, the two halves of the audience watched each other’s reactions through the duration of the show. At the play’s dramatic and comedic peaks, this unique visibility allowed the audience members to feed off of each other.

Director Matt Stai ’18 noted that having a small cast in such a compressed, minimal space was tricky. For much of the play, only two of the three actors were onstage at once – and since the narrative was driven by dialogue far more than plot, they needed to be meticulous about their body language.

“For me, I think the greatest challenge with this show was how to keep the action interesting in a show of two people talking on a blank stage,” Stai said. The actors took care to pace the stage area in a way that gave their performances fluidity and dynamism.

If you are not familiar with the Myswyken Salad Theatre Company, it is because it was just born this year. First-years interested in doing theater at St. Olaf found it difficult to access roles in faculty and student-run plays. Rather than resigning themselves to the sidelines, a group of like-minded freshmen found each other in Intro to Acting and formed the company to create more opportunities.

“At the beginning of first semester, we were having trouble being part of department and Deep End shows. Our intention was to make more theater opportunities available,” Sutherland said.

The label “company” is not just a title – it refers to the structure of the group. Stai explained how that model differentiates the group from department and Deep End participants.

“By the company model, we mean a structure where a pre-determined, limited number of theater-makers work together to create shows over a duration. Our company in particular is looking to operate with a minimum of structured hierarchy to encourage a free-flowing artistic dialogue,” Stai said.

“At the beginning of the year, people will audition for the company,” Sutherland said. Most Ole thespians are accustomed to auditioning on a production-by-production basis, but this structure allows the group to draw from a consistent pool of actors.

Though the first-years of Myswyken Salad have plenty of audacity, mentorship from upperclassmen was crucial in launching the group.

“Denzel Belin ’15 and Preston West ’15 helped us a lot,” Sutherland said. Fittingly, Belin was listed in the show’s credits as “Wise Sage.”


Categories: Colleges

Inclusivity in question

Manitou Messenger - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 3:39pm


t. Olaf has an unfortunate history of anonymous vandalism. Two years ago, a display about Palestine had two flags removed from it, and a poster reading “Death in Gaza” was vandalized to read “Death to Gaza.” Between 2011 and 2013, the rainbow flag in front of the St. Olaf Queer Support and Outreach honor house was stolen approximately five times. Now, another such incident has forced the college to question whether its community is truly inclusive.

In late March, the Gender and Sexuality Center (GSC) held PGP Awareness Week. PGP stands for “Preferred Gender Pronouns.” These are the pronouns people use to refer to themselves, such as “he/him,” “she/her,” “they/them,” “ze/zir” or “xi/xir.” Over 130 students took pledges to wear buttons inviting people to ask them about their PGPs and raise awareness of gender-neutral pronouns. Students also posted photos of themselves holding signs with their preferred pronouns. These pictures were placed in the hallway to Boe Memorial Chapel, and several were made into posters. The event was tarnished, however, when the photos and posters of students using gender-neutral pronouns, or who were otherwise perceivably transgender, were removed on the last night of the display. The community was alerted to the incident via e-mails sent by Student Government Association (SGA) President Rachel Palermo ’15 and Vice President Nick Stumo-Langer ’15, and by Rosalyn Eaton-Neeb ’87, Dean of Students, and Greg Kneser, Vice President of Student Life, speaking for the Student Life Office.

Carly Tsuda ’15, a GSC coordinator, explained why the poster incident was damaging.

“Regardless of what the person who removed the photos was trying to accomplish, the message that we received was ‘Non-binary identities aren’t valid.’ This message, coming from our peers, is immensely hurtful to students who are already reminded that so many people feel this way on a day-to-day basis.”

Emery Rankin-Utevsky ’18 agreed. “I was one of the students who was targeted as a visibly trans person, and so my first reaction was fear,” ze said.

“To me, this felt like someone on campus very clearly saying, ‘I don’t want you here.’”

In response, Sustained Dialogues, the new campus group aiming to facilitate communication and confront controversial campus issues, held a discussion on April 13 in Valhalla. People were disappointed with the St. Olaf community, agreed that the act was both passive-aggressive and uncalled for, and talked about ways that the campus could make improvements for transgender students, including the implementation of more gender-neutral bathrooms and gender-neutral housing.

In addition, Gay, Lesbian or Whatever! (GLOW!) and the GSC held a special discussion during the GLOW! meeting of April 15 to discuss how to respond to acts of aggression and how to support a marginalized community. “The Table” honor house also held a discussion on April 18 to discuss ways to foster a more inclusive community.

Rankin-Utevsky attended the Sustained Dialogues.

“The discussion gave us a chance to talk about the issue and not be talked at,” he said. “My only concern was that the people there likely weren’t people who perpetrated the vandalism, so those weren’t reached. But I think it was important for people who are concerned about this to talk about it. Multiple targets were there and it was good for us to feel supported by the school.”

Kneser explained why Sustained Dialogues are so vital in this era of secret harassment, especially compared to the previous incidents.

“The nature of people doing these things anonymously was frustrating at the time and remains frustrating now,” he said. “But one positive thing now is the presence of the Sustained Dialogues program. We have a mechanism to go to now.”

Tsuda agreed, and praised the overall handling of the situation.

“We really want to reinforce how much positive engagement we had with the week as a whole, and with the responses to this incident. There were so many offers to help, and people trying to think of ways to reach out to the students affected by this,” she said. “Overall, the support has been so great, and we could not have asked for more from campus leadership.”

While there is no way to undo the damage from the vandalism, the St. Olaf community appears to be working together to move forward, make campus more inclusive for everybody and prevent something like this from happening again. Kneser thinks the student body should go one step further.

“The issue of microaggressions is, sadly, a part of life,” he said. “Social media fuels it, and the best way to call it out is for individuals to say ‘knock it off.’ It’s a daily challenge. We often look to other people and institutions to fix it for us, but the best place for us to address it is in our own house.” 


Categories: Colleges

Touching down in “America’s Finest City”

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

I know that this phrase signals home. I know the descent of planes into “America’s Finest City” by heart. I love San Diego so much that my fear of flying vanishes when I see the landmarks of the place I was born during the flight descent.

Categories: Colleges

The minor grievances of home

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

Eau Claire is a pretty typical Midwestern town. There isn’t much to do. There are a couple of rivers (floating on the Chippewa River is popular in the summer months), some decent restaurants, and a few movie theaters, including one of the ever-rarer nostalgia mines that is the drive-in theater.

Categories: Colleges

A place at the top

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

I hail from Edina, Minnesota: land of the cake eaters and home of the world’s first indoor shopping mall. I grew up in a Minnesotan paradise full of large houses, country clubs, fake tanned people, and Juicy Couture sweat suits.

Categories: Colleges


Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

Things That Complicate My Relationship With New England.

Categories: Colleges

Climate change and the many faces of denial: A response on divestment

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

I believe the Board’s response [to divestment] is part of a problem of mass denial, a failure in the consciousness of our society as a whole.

Categories: Colleges

April showers, short-lived flowers

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

Maybe you forgot during this week’s rain and hail, but it is in fact spring!

Categories: Colleges

Men’s track finishes first in front of home crowd

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

Jerry Cook-Gallardo and Colby Seyferth both won individual events and ran a portion of the victorious 4x400-meter relay at the Carleton Relays that the Carleton Men’s Track and Field Team hosted at Laird Stadium.

Categories: Colleges

Women’s track season debut breaks record books

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

The Carleton College women’s track and field team made the most of its lone home meet of the 2015 season as the Knights broke three school records while hosting the Carleton Relays.

Categories: Colleges

Call me farmboy

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

Home is what you make it— and what you make it for other people. Different elements of your experience, the people in your home, and how you think about your space make it your home.

Categories: Colleges

Editorial: The stewardship of ideas

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

"Yes, it’s probably fair to say Carleton leans left, but doing so also blankets the campus in one beige color of sameness. I worry about those who feel they don’t fit into the beige blanket."

Categories: Colleges

Eight Carls score coveted Fulbright fellowships, adventures abroad

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

This year, seven Carleton seniors and one recent alumni of Carleton were awarded English Teaching Assistant Grants (ETAs).

Categories: Colleges

Secret music library fuses the eclectic

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

A resource free to access for all Carls, yet not known to many outside the Music department, is the Music Resource Center (MRC).

Categories: Colleges

Tennis ties win record with 21

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

In a surprisingly close match, the Carleton College men’s tennis team prevailed, 5-4, at Concordia College and captured their 21st victory of the season to equal the Knights’ team record.

Categories: Colleges

Lawler Nearing Perfection

Carletonian - Fri, 04/24/2015 - 12:00pm

Carleton rookie pitcher Alec Lawler continued his breakout season on the mound with two near-perfect performances last week.

Categories: Colleges

Bookmark and Share

Syndicate content